Thursday, October 1, 2009

"You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile."

"You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile." - Third of Five/Hugh, Star Trek: The Next Generation episode "I, Borg

I think I am being assimilated. The other night I was standing in front of our apartment talking to Michaela on the phone (because reception is so poor here, I often go outside to chat on the phone). It was about 10:30pm. Hannah was asleep in the bedroom, the room nearest the street. This car pulled up and started honking, and honking, and HONKING. Often car services will honk twice to announce their arrival to their customers. This guy was honking to get his friend to come down. I walked over and yelled "Hey buddy, my kid's sleeping over there. Use your phone!" Michaela was freaking out, convinced I was about to get shot. I didn't even think of that. I was just mad that this guy was so inconsiderate and I was going to give him a talking to for it.

Also, I have mentioned before that Hannah still rides in the AWESOME stroller Paul got me a couple of years ago. She rides in there for several reasons, not the least of which is to help me get her and our stuff where we need to go. We often walk at least a few miles a day. Now that I am wearing Elijah, people seem to think it's OK to tell my 6 year old that she's too big for the stroller. I think they think they are taking up for me, that Hannah's in Elijah's spot or something. They don't know that one of my absolute favorite things in the world is wearing babies and that I wore Hannah until her feet drug the ground. Anyway, I have selected my response for the next time this happens - "Whattah you? Duh strolluah police? Don't tawlk to my kid about tings you don't unduhstand."

Don't worry, if I were truly being assimilated, there would be a couple of F bombs thrown in there for emphasis. And Paul says I've always been like this but I have to behave myself in The South. Paul says, "You aren't being assimilated, you've found your people."


  1. The other Amber in BrooklynOctober 1, 2009 at 7:50 AM

    One of us... one of us...

    I really, really hope I'm with you when someone gives you lip for Hannah being in the stroller.

  2. ROFLOL.....There are tears in my eyes I am laughing so hard...NYC-look out, you have always had a great response when others tread on you and your kid handling. Paul-remember that Expedition incident with the crazy man in the trashed out car and how you smiled at him, nodded and said, "Nice car...." Now, you guys need to work on getting the cussing out of the hood by showing all of the peeps out there how fun it is to express yourselves without expletives and yet get your point accross-you of all of us Can do it!